Madison nears record snowfall

Residents of 5 Rudi celebrate

RUDI, WI - More than a foot of snow fell in the Madison area yesterday forcing numerous cancellations and stranding over 2,000 motorists on Interstate 39-90, south of the city. Gov. Jim Doyle declared a state of emergency and called upon the Wisconsin National Guard for aid.

Madison is now two inches away from setting a new seasonal snowfall record. The previous benchmark (set in 1978-1979) stands at 76.1 inches. Forecasters are predicting 2 -3 inches of additional accumulations for the coming weekend.

But as many area residents are expressing frustration over the winter that seems to never end, Yeah, I Figured columnists (and housemates), GDub and Grease couldn't be happier.

"As I pulled into an unplowed Rudi Cir, my car got stuck," explained Grease. "I began to realize the few hundred feet that seperated me from the driveway may as well have been a few hundred miles."

Undaunted, Grease reached for his shovel and began the arduous task of clearing a path wide enough for his Jetta. Any signs of progress were quickly blanketed as the pace of snowfall quickened.

"At that point I contemplated digging a grave, laying in it, and waiting for the plow to end this nightmare. Instead my prayers were answered."

Emerging from 5 Rudi was GDub, who earlier in the day returned from a conference in Oconomowoc.

GDub spotted his troubled friend and shouted, "Hold on Grease, I'm coming!"

A concerned Grease pleaded, "No! The snow is at least a foot deep, you'll drown!"

Cheating certain death, GDub somehow managed to reach Grease. And with the help of a neighbor, the Jetta was able to pull into the garage.

"This near record snow proved dire travel, but brought the two of us back together," said Grease.

Both men had not been on speaking terms for the better part of a month.

Perhaps due to close quarter nerves or sexually explicit thin walls, neither would confirm the reason behind the riff. Whatever the case may be, an exhausted, yet hopeful, GDub exclaimed:

"We're back and stronger than ever!"

An hour later, the two finished shoveling the driveway.