Mariachi Announces Presidential Candidacy
GLENDALE, CA (YIFTM) – The insurmountable Mexican war hero, known only as El, has announced today that he will join the “list of losers” in the 2008 Presidential race. As the leading member for the Mariachi Party, El represents the muscle, the brains, and yes the pulchritudinous good looks almost nonexistent in just about every other confirmed Presidential elect throughout this nation’s sorry history. “Fuck Americans,” one excited voter exclaimed, “We’ve had nothing but piss poor luck with Americans running American, it’s time for The Biggest Mexican this world has ever seen. Fuck I’m excited!”
The younger brother, or guitarista, of the estranged drug kingpin Bucho, El must prove to the voting public that rape, drug distribution, and the murdering of one’s own crew are not a family trait. El explains, “Yes, yes. It’s haaard to ignore that Bucho was my brother, and yes, he was a very bad man, and yes he sold drugs, raped beautiful, beautiful women and one time burned down Carolina’s bookstore. But, I am not Bucho. I am the biggest shit this country, this WORLD has ever seen. Yes, I am a Mexican, and yes I will be your next President.” 
EL IN ’08
Yeah, I Figured That Much
3 comments:
I've been told by a trusted source that if I own the DVDs of "El Mariachi" "Desperado" and "Once Upon a Time in Mexico" I should catalog all three under E for El Mariachi Trilogy. What is the opinion of Yeah, I Figured That Much?
Our opinion is this: the entire trilogy should be filed under "M" for Mariachi. Other accepted shelf placements: "M" - Mexico Trilogy, "R" - Robert Rodriguez's Mexico, Mariachi, Trilogy, "S" - South of the Border Trilogy.
My personal advice is to stick it where the sun don't shine.
File under "B" for Bucho.
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